30 Oct (Tue)… … Didn’t sleep at all after 4hrs of crying,all i do is stare into space blankly… I really couldn’t believe it… He love me,but need time to forget his ex-gf??? She hurt him,then he hurt me,LOVE CYCLE??? He called me at 7plus while going work,i know he still care but why must this be the outcome? Promised that i’ll go have dinner but maybe i haven’t eaten for whole day,the moment i get out of bed,i almost black out… Therefore quickly lie on bed again. He’ll be coming over pass me my i/c after work,will be bringing me to eat too… I know i had alot to tell him but the moment i saw him i’m lost for words. I totally had no appetite for anything,not even my favourite MacDonald… Its a rainy day,went AMK West Garden Mac but rain get heavier so no choice but to go Yishun 925 because got shelter mah… This is the first time he walked without me… Haix,really couldn’t finish what he bought for me,my appetite totally lost le…We didn’t talked much,most of the time he’s the one who start talking,i’m not the noisy SHADOW anymore. Infact i’m controlling my tears,i keep telling myself not to cry… Inside the lift he tickled me,maybe he wana see me smile and my ‘tut tut’ mouth ba. At my door step,i wanted so much to hug him without letting go but didn’t have the courage to do so… We made a deal,i have to sleep then he’ll be good boy don’t go out… ST came took his sotong from me,chatted awhile before going back be his good gal. I couldn’t sleep,but i forced myself to sleep so that i can join him in dreamland…
31 Oct (Wed)… … Slept for few hours,better than never sleep. Gave him morning call at 9am,he going Defu Lane ‘heal’ the rim… As the person-in- charge not around so not going le… After i get my things done at HDB Hub,while on my way to City Hall for an appointment i decided to meet him. He picked me up at City Hall,went Gan Motor do his ‘chicken wing’ then Sin Ming put car to do rim… We took a cab to Junction 8,first thing is to heal our stomach. As it was lunch time so every where was pack… Had wanted to catch a movie to kill time but no available timing,therefore we gotta walk round and round at Junction 8. Finally sat down at Mos Burger for a drink,went back collect car then go AMk do the stupid piping again… Time past real fast,it was already 5pm when we get everything done,time for us to part liao… Therefore i don’t even turn my head over to wave goodbye,i can’t bear to leave him. When asked about the holiday trip he promised,he say will let me know again,infact i already know the answer le,we won’t be able to go together de… Woke up for dinner,he told me yc was beside him when i sms him… At 12.44am he called me,that was the last i heard from him… As usual,i’ll sms him when i’m home,was waiting for his reply but disappointed when i sent another sms also no reply… The sudden urge of leaving this place came to me… Didn’t sleep at all the whole night,haix… Insomnia again…

29 Oct (Mon)… … Another 2 bottles of ai-xin barley water,meant to be a super surprise for him by turning up at his house,but he need to go get his tattoo done as his tattoo artist is available and i know his tattoo mean alot to him so i never stop him from going… Finally i had the courage to confess to XZ that me and him together le,i told him about it and he asked if we will last so i replied saying its not for me to say anything,and if things don’t work out also no choice but i’ve promised that i’ll be his good gal,an obedient girlfriend… Will be meeting my bro,W and his wife for dinner so he came fetched me and i get him to send me to Newton first as i wanted to pass him my sincerity and love(barley water)… Went to the ‘tong shui’ cafe opposite Great World City,L and gf joined us too. Meet S and W for a drink at Boat Quay,NOS… Was drinking happily until when our topic changed to Yishun,they knew my wonderful brothers who are still inside,my mood changed… Super ‘tan-kup’… I was very high but i still managed to get home,he was very angry that he suddenly said we were not meant to be together,tears rolled down… Since 4plus i’ve been crying like hell,non-stop till morning 8am i’m still crying…

*because of him,i’ve become the old days SHADOW… Sorry to all my friends,i’ve let all of you down,i’ve break the promise that i’ve been keeping to all of you,sorry for disappointing all of you… He totally changed me into another SHADOW liao… The hurt he brought to me is more than what yc brought me,although we just 1 week together,by right the hurt shouldn’t be so deep but he’s the one who melted this iceberg… All of you should know that its not easy to melt it but he did le… I’m totally not myself le once i know i started what i used to like alot*

26 Oct (Fri)… … The last day of funeral,woke DarDar up after i’ve bathed… He was there for me throughout,i told him that if it was that past tense of mine,he won’t be with me at all lor… Really THANKS alot alot!!! After everything was done i went home wanting to have a good sleep,ke-lian de DarDar still gotta work… Was woken up by many calls,as it was Friday so all the calls were asking me to go FLY lor,lolx… Aiyo,super pack when i was there but i managed to go in after awhile,my friend bring me cut queue,keke… Many familiar faces were there,as usual i gotta fly around but alone as my besties weren’t there. Had too much mixing,was high soon… Keep wanting DarDar to fetch me,made him so fedup,SORRY… Caused him to ‘hurt’ his rim,my fault again… He did,fetched me from fly and the next moment i found myself at OG,OMG!!! But never play,we made a turn at Cine carpark then back to Dar’s house le… Kept talking to him till he can’t sleep,keke…
27 Oct (Sat)… … We woke up quite early cause Dar wanted to go Defu Lane ‘heal’ his rim,but cannot do on the spot so make appointment for next Tuesday. Went Hougang 805 for lunch then back to my house to rest till time for Dar to go work… Naughty Dar don’t want sleep,watched tv till 3plus then sleep and i also fell asleep unknowingly. Inorder to watch movie with Dar,told the gals that i won’t be flying with them tonight,and they understand,cause they’re my sisters lor… Suddenly i received a call from XZ,got the urge to tell him the truth but don’t know how to put it. Haix,had to tell a lie… Book tickets for "Brothers" showing at 1.45am,CineLeisure. Dar came fetched me straight after work… This is our first movie together,so sweet… After movie,smoked outside,find it weird that OG was so quiet so decided to sms C and he told me that they were at Tanglin going to start liao so we stayed there awhile to see those cars zoom past. Then XZ called Dar,he had to tell him that we watched movie together. The moment we reached Newton,eyes were looking at us,though machine guns weren’t aimed at us but the atmosphere was kinda weird lor… Linda at East Coast Mac with her friend,i wanted to go find her but her friend paiseh wor,so Dar brought me to AMK West Garden Mac for my breakfast so that after that he can go over Ave 3 wash car. First time accompany Dar wash car,and first time so early in the morning at 6am…

不要你爱的刹那 
在挣扎
你说过的话 
那滴泪
太美 沉醉的安慰
麻醉 我苦笑着入睡
不要你真的太傻
错以为伤心的绝对
那眼神太美
是痴迷的光辉
幸福不过最后的天黑
爱你太多
我爱的太执着
我爱的犯了错
一直到你挣脱
才知道爱太多
会让你受折磨
那心痛的好难过
最后发现爱的太多
伤你也太多

不要你真的太傻
错以为伤心的绝对
那眼神太美
是痴迷的光辉
幸福不过最后的天黑
爱你太多
我爱的太执着
我爱的犯了错
一直到你挣脱
才知道爱太多
会让你受折磨
那心痛的好难过
最后发现
今生今世对你爱太多
对你爱的太执着
那不是我的错
你不要再闪躲
做一切都值得
不要你再难过
去背负起那折磨
直到有天
你会发现你还是爱我

19 Oct (Fri)… … Prepared myself,dressed up nice nice go Vivo meet my clubbing kaki,Eileen for dinner before FLYING… Haix,early bird again,early high again… The moment i reached already got 3 tables to go,my besties,Vivien and Juan not here yet. I really didn’t know how much i drank that nite,till A and his gf reached then i stopped drinking at their table. When he wanted to intro his friend to me,to my surprise,i know this person too… Took a pic together,then i start flying with those gals again till when we finally settled at AG’s table,i knew i can’t drink anymore but inorder to look after my besties,i gotta drink on their behalf… Live band time,which means ‘tan-kup’ time,i’m controlling my tears,V also controlling hers… Tears rolled down my cheeks again,AG was there for me lending me his shoulder,THANKS!!! End of the day,at 5.30am i wasn’t the one who’s really dead drunk,just that legs super tired… AG’s friend sent us back,including the driver 7 of us were in the car,5 of us squeezed behind,so tiring… After the gals had reached home safely,i went for my favourite MacDonald breakfast with the 3 guys at Hougang Point,reached home at 8plus… What are we??? Brother and sister only…
20 Oct (Sat)… … After a short chat and sms,i fell asleep at 10plus and woke up at 3pm… Tonight going XZ’s house for BBQ wor,arranged for us gals to be picked up at 9pm. The moment we (Da,Juan,ViVien,me) reached XZ’s house,we self service ourselves around,taking photos,explore etc… Waited and waited,stomach hungry le but still must wait… But is worth waiting cause the guys are good chefs,compared to many BBQs i went before,keke… Didn’t really eat much though the food’s nice,haix,today is the day i dread most,trying alot not to be blur or down inorder not to spoil the host’s mood. When XZ sent Da home,i tagged along in the car,together with AG and F. When Da reached home,he was waiting for her at downstairs,all of us in the car were stunned… Back to XZ’s house,the whole night i was watching tv,wanted to watch mok-mok movie but nobody want to watch with me… … Although B volunteered,but i don’t want to watch with him cause i know endup he’ll be the one scaring me instead…
21 Oct (Sun)… … Stayed till 8am,the guys cleared up before going back,AG sent me home… Again sms before going to sleep,but that was already 12noon when i fell asleep,woke up at 3pm… I was told by mum that uncle’s condition getting worst,gotta visit him at hospital when i’m free later. At 8plus,S came fetched to Mt Alvernia,my uncle was at one of the hospice at that area… My whole heart sank when i saw the condition he was in,i tried my very best not to cry. Inorder not to keep S waiting,i left after 20mins,meet Vivien for a short drink at Punggol Park,Bliss… Was waiting for XZ’s reply to see got what programme,till decided to go V’s house bring back a bottle of Vodka. Had the sudden urge of ‘ice-skating’ but my dearest didi (AG) don’t allowed… Haven’t had anything for the whole day,went Serangoon prata with A and XJ,but just when i started on my plaster,mum called with a bad news… XZ didn’t answered my call,didi happened to call me so had to ask him fetched me to hospital. I was late,uncle had left me when i reached… I couldn’t controlled my tears anymore,burst out crying,again let didi see me cry… Was so touched that he’s actually the one there for me when i was down and needed someone. When the adults were seeing to the funeral arrangements,we went back to XZ’s house… I was totally lost but still gotta put up a brave front infront of those guys,haix… Left over prata,as i didn’t complete mine earlier on didi made me eat…
22 Oct (Mon)… … My dearest didi sent me over to Bishan at 6plus,the moment i was in car i fell asleep after telling him the address. I didn’t even know how long i’ve been sleeping till when i woke up i was already there… Thanks for lending me your shoulder to sleep while you do nothing,keke… As usual,we sms till when he reached home then we chatted on the phone. Naughty didi don’t want to sleep,i gotta busy le so had to ‘pang-seh’ him liao… I went home for a short rest cause my duty was to keep watch at night. We chatted till 2pm,i was too tired to carry on le… Wokeup at 7pm to prepare myself,Da came over as S will be fetching me. Didi want tabao food for me after work wor,so sweet… Didi came with my favourite ‘gon-gon’ and stingray,YUMMY!!! After eating we sent Da back,went Boat Quay for a drink with T at NOS… Meant to be a short drink but we ended up drinking till 6am… Naughty didi drank too much le,still gotta drive,kinda worried he can’t make it lor… ke-lian T gotta help sent 2 friends home while me of course follow my dearest didi lor… Had wanted to send me to Bishan but while at somewhere after Parklane,the stupid piping loose then stupid didi don’t have correct screw driver to tighten it,OH SHIT!!! Called T for help but decided to drive slowly back as his house was around the area…
23 Oct (Tue)… … So this is how we started… Had actually concluded to Vivien before that he can only be friend and nothing else but… Da wasn’t surprise when i told her we were together,she had expected,just that sooner or later nia… Had explained to Vivien that when sparks wana light up fire,there’s nothing i can do to stop the fire too… Was glad that i got blessings from sisters but i know they’re worried that i’ll get hurt agian,cause they know that i can’t afford to get hurt anymore. Another one who has dog,think i must slowly overcome the fear… Woke him up earlier,need to do car and also sent me to Bishan take keys then back home  to change then he go work… After work he went find me straight… As i still didn’t know how to break the news to the rest,he gotta lied to them about his whereabouts. The whole night at the wake i was gambling with 2 of my uncles and he was there keeping me company,till morning then sent me home and he headed home to rest too…
24 Oct (Wed)… … Made ai-xin barley water for DarDar,meant to be a surprise for him… After doing things for my brothers,took a cab to Newton just to pass him 2 bottles of ai-xin barley water. First time in my life doing this,he was shocked too… Naughty DarDar went Zouk after work,but promised to go find me after zouking. Had keep reminding him not to drink too much,worry mah… But the moment he reached Bishan at 4am,he dozed off… So angry… As i like to sleep in bucket seat,we change seat,keke… After a short rest i woke up for breakfast,was so hungry that i ate 2 packets of wan-ton mee,my uncle was shocked to see what a BIG appetite i’ve got. Maybe falling in love makes me happy so even appetite also good lor… While i was gambling halfway,naughty DarDar woke up le…
25 Oct (Thur)… … Sent me home,wanted me to rest but i don’t feel tired at all. We watched dvd then DarDar went back to change,came fetched me again before going AMK service his car. I felt myself very power,never sleep but don’t feel tired at all,maybe because having him by my side is more than enough le so not tired lor… After servicing car,went AMK trim my hair then headed for HMV eat Sakae Sushi… After eating went Taka walk walk awhile then sent me to Bishan while he had dinner with his family. At 11plus went Bishan fetched me home to change,while i was preparing myself DarDar fell asleep… He was sleeping so soundly that i couldn’t bear to wake him up but still have to cause we still had to go else where before we can go back to his house to have a good sleep. Oh,forget to mention about my ‘nightmare’… HeeHee… My ‘nightmare’ is in DarDar’s car to company me,can hughug… Actually DarDar’s doggie very cute,slowly i’m overcoming the fear but still got abit afraid,give me some more time ba,keke…
      

14 Oct (Sun)… … Was at Pub MongKok with Sebas and friends,our world lor,sing till i high sia… Tired of chinese songs,and finally found my kaki for hokkien songs. They were surprised that my hokkien songs are that power lor,lolx… Sing drink,sing drink,withi=out realising that i’ve drunk alot. Mr R came fetched me but saw me so high,he talked to me in a harsh tone,out of anger i dropped at somewhere,called Sebas to come back for me… The only way for me to vent my frustrations,CRY!!! I cried… Again… For that worthless BASTARD!!! I was so touched that upon answering my call, hearing my cries,XZ rushed all the way back from River Valley… We chatted alot,but most of the times i’m the one doing the talking,cause i wanted to let off what’s inside me. DEAR XIAOZHU,I TREASURE OUR FRIENDSHIP!!! THANKS LOTS LOTS!!! After letting off,i felt so much better… But how long can this last??? Because of him i don’t dare to put in my whole for the new relationship,will the next love of mine blame me for this???

09 Oct (Tue)… … D came fetched me at SengKang after coming back from JB with M,went over Di’s place to pick him up,went to the ‘tong-shui’ at Zion Road for dessert as it was Di’s birthday. Haix,today’s also FLY’s anniversary,had been receiving lotsa calls and sms asking me to go,these people make my heart itchy only but luckily my determination was strong enough to reject everyone,keke… As M stayed Jurong West,gotta sent him home first. Mr R came fetched me right after i reached home… He drove his friend’s car,all the way from Aliwal St to Hougang back to Aliwal St again,he was there at a pub with his friends,funny name the pub has got,GRAZS… We drank till 2am,went Boat Quay to continue,i suggested NOS_NUMBERS. The moment our car drove past qb qool pub,on my right hand side i saw a familiar potato,the car’s number plate even more familiar… "FUCKING BASTARD" came out from my mouth,on a piece of paper i wrote ‘FUCKING BASTARD,OWE $450 PAY $450′ and left it on the windscreen of his car… HAHA!!! I enjoyed myself so much at NOS with Mr R,and we drank till 6 in the morning with 3 more friends,went chalet after that. So tired that as soon as i was in the room,i fell asleep all the way till 4pm…
10 Oct (Wed)… … After Mr R and his friend sent me home,i quickly prepared myself as i’ll be having dinner with XZ and Da. We were at AMK Hub "Fish & Co",saw my bestie,ViVien too,she was with her family. After sending Da home,i couldn’t resist the temptation anymore… After much consideration,i decided to change and head down Clarke Quay to ‘GeoGrapher’ as it was their anniversary,since A kept persuading me so i obliged. Just as i expected,A once again expressed his feelings for me… HAIX… To avoid answering his weirdy questions,going over Lunar will be a better choice. Before i could enjoy myself at Lunar,Mr R sms me… The shocking thing from him was asking me to leave immediately cause he had already reached,OMG!!! Haix,fancy throwing temper at me for no reason… His friends thought i’ll know why he’s in a foul mood,but i told them i also don’t know wor… NOS still had balance,went there again. Was sms with WC till he suddenly sent me something funny,Mr R took my hp but i didn’t know he did replied to WC till i received a ‘OK’ from him,referred back to my sent items then i realised Mr R did sent him something… … Haix,then guess who i saw… Diana,she was with her friends and also Marcus,who’s with his colleagues… Was too engrossed in my conversations with Marcus over WC’s accident and also my bro’s coming wedding that i neglected Mr R,he was angry wor,so small gas… The same thing,drank till 6am then went Hougang 401 for breakfast… …
11 Oct (Thur)… … Though i’d been having late nights these few days but i don’t feel tired at all. The gals (ViVien and Juan) had arranged for dinner,XZ picked them up first then came over SengKang for me then WoodLands for Da. Vegetables car… Think only the 5 of us and XZ’s group of friends will know what it mean… Had dinner at Newton,first time eating ‘ang gong siao’ bbq fish. Only me and Da knows how to appreciate ‘gong-gong’… Had XZ sent me to Central Mall,S was there at a pub,’MongKok’. Drink again… Besides drinking what else can i do??? Oh,me and Da look like sisters??? She 21 and i’m 23… Keke… Couldn’t sleep when i was home,had Vodka by myself again,INSOMNIA sia…
12 Oct (Fri)… … FLHAIR!!! To do manicure and blow my hair… To prepare myself for tonight’s party. Classic manicure,had the same colour as Da… Blow my hair,but not as curl as what i had last week… We (Da,Joy,me) were waiting for Mr H for dinner when Liyan called up to meet too. After dinner we went our separate ways,Liyan meet her friends,Da and Joy went back while i was with Mr H and V. Went Changi General Hospital to visit one of their friend before going FLY for F’s birthday… FULL HOUSE,so packed… Sianx lor… I took about 30mins just to walk 1 round,saw David there with his friends but since he leaving soon so had a drink with him. Stupid A was at dance floor keep asking me go over but so pack sia,how do i squeeze in??? First time in my life at FLY never anyhow fly due to the crowd,was such a good gal sitting down lor… Left for MOS,first time encounter at the lounge which was meant for VIP… But i was told by Mr R to leave again,this time they had 3 cars waiting for me,haix,what can i say… Sianx!!! Again Boat Quay was NOS full house so went over to Double Cs… Again drank till 6am,send D’s friend back to Jurong then had breakfast before going home…
13 Oct (Sat)… … Grandma’s birthday,had dinner there and at the same time visited my uncle,he counting his days le… Went home to change,S came fetched me to ‘MongKok’,my bestie joined me after her gathering. When her friend was there to fetch her,i took a ride over to Clarke Quay find Mr H who’s at Lunar. S and R joined me at Lunar later,even Sandy also came after closing… Haix… Feelings??? Everything happened so fast,had no time to react at all… Why am i always falling in love at the wrong time??? Its true that i’m exposing myself to guys when i club or pub,but as long as i know what i’m doing can liao,not every guys can get near me… You’re hurt,what about me??? The SHADOW that you see now already don’t know how to throw temper anymore,no matter how you shout at me but please,there’s a limit too… Though i’m not ready yet but accepting someone who dotes on me so much is better than me wasting my time on someone who may not be worth… He’s surrounded by gals,so much gals,but why me??? So funny… Is he true,is he going to tolerate my nonsense???
    

I shall not waste my time and energy to quarrel with somebody who dare not reveal his/her identity when reading my blog… I’m a well-known ah lian to those who know me and i come from a pai-kia family. If you’re not sure who you’re clashing with,please ask your ‘dino’ about me… Haix,she thought she can mess with me but she’s wrong. In replying to me prove to everybody that her heart is not broad enough to endure critisim,so small gas… Since she like to wear my old shoes so much,by all means,go ahead but please be careful when u have sex with him. Please make sure he take safety pre-caution if you don’t wana be asked to go for abortion… If you wana know why,ask your ‘dino’ or you may ask me if you want,i’ll be very willing to tell you how he hurt me physically,not once but twice. By the way,long time ago i’ve already give up reading your blog cause i find it a waste of time…And oh ya,just a gentle reminder for you… … If you don’t me to sms him,then you better tell him not to sms me first,i replied as a form of courtesy if not he’ll think i go drinking if i don’t reply. If you wana see what he sms me,i can show you also if you’re interested…

03 Oct (Wed)… … YEAH!!! Tuas again… Went West Coast Mac for my ‘Happy Meal’ and at the same time to wait for XZ’s friends. WAH,that day West Coast also got ‘qi-chia’ then heard that 40 tiangs also lor,but me going Tuas. HaHa,joker Alex was there too. Hmmmm,today’s race not very interesting lor. As my buddies were waiting for me at ‘attap’ so XZ sent me there. Haix,the first question they asked was why i lost so much weight? I’m so sick and tired of this question lor… Before heading home,we were so ‘bo-liao’ as to purposely go dam smoke first then went home…
04 Oct (Thur)… … Boring,boring,boring… D came fetched me to Safra Town Club,drinking with his colleagues. It was quite a good place for relaxing… After some drinking,M suggested FLY. So angry,me in tshirt,shorts and slippers,but since it’s not my first time in such dress code to FLY,so i went along. Though kinda funny cox everyone there was dressed up,but u think i care??? Aiyo,H sms me,he was at LUNAR again,so i told him i’m at FLY and will join him tomorrow… And he addressed mr as ‘FLY QUEEN’… LOLX!!! The 3 of us left at 2am,headed to Geylang Lor 3 for supper,but the 2 guys stunned me with something… They wanted to overnight at Hotel 81,their homeground so that they need not rush home to sleep as they are in morning shift tomorrow. OH,me how??? As i couldn’t reached XZ,try my luck to sms ST(T). He thought i sms wrong person but i told him the message was for him,and he agreed to fetch me without hesitation. Thought he was outside maybe will be easier for him,but he was home. when D and M learnt that he stayed Clementi,they were shocked that he would come all the way just to fetch me home. At that very moment,my heart melted again and was so happy to see him… Haix,the journey seemed fast,how i wished time could stopped… The reason why he’s willing to fetch me will remain as a mystery,only he himself got the answer… …
05 Oct (Fri)… … M picked me up at Balestier Shaw Plaza,went to a pub at Jalan Besar with his friends,quite a ulu place but still alright lah. YJ was at Vivo having dinner,got XZ to help me fetched her from there to here,paiseh wor… As i was meeting H 11.15pm at Clarke Quay,so this time it was M’s turn to help me go Bishan fetched DaDa then sent us there. Aiyo,H looked like ’sugar daddy’ to me,a mature guy like him bringing 7 gals to LUNAR… The place was very ‘china’,the waitress were all in cheongsam with red hairs. Hmmmm,think i still preferred the live band at FLY… As usual,Da,YJ and me took photos. And when we were at the sofa seat,i blend so well with the color,RED sofa + RED cushion… Quite some time didn’t had CHIVAS le,so tasty… XZ fetched us at 2pm,meet the rest at Newton carpark before going Mr Prata for supper. Before we left,i quickly ran over to J’s car as i had mentioned before that i wanted to have a feel of his car… Through talkies those guys were making fun of me as i was in red. B asked J to remember to lock the door incase i’ll commit suicide,blah blah blah,loads of rubbish… I was laughing all the way,HAHAHA… Da in B’s car was laughing her head off too… Aiyo,so tired,time’s up le but car not around. By the time car’s back,sent YJ then Da,it was 7am when i reached home… Zzz Zzz Zzz Zzz Zzz Zzz
06 Oct (Sat)… … So damn tired but still gotta wake up early to do my things before i can prepare myself to go out. Meet YJ at AMK hub first before going C’s salon to trim my hair,ViVien overslept sia… Was persuaded to curl my hair,so give it a try… When it’s done,i almost didn’t had the courage to walk out of the salon,as it was the first time i had my hair curled. As usual lor,will take afew photos lor… Ha,as S had arranged D to pick us gals up to FLY so we had  a quick dinner at Mos Burger and it was only 9pm when we reached… First time had sofa seat,no one to squeeze with us. As my Da-Lin couldn’t resist the temptation of us at FLY,she came after her movie,haha… And T came with an ex-actor,Bryan so we took turns to take photo with him. Tony,Boon and wife were also there… That funny Alex took such a long time to reach FLY,by the time he’s there i was already high le…  Met a few jokers that were high also,loads of craps and rubbish. CRAZY sia… As for what happen after FLYING,shall not mention in here. ViVien,YJ and XZ,just to let you know that the tears i shed were not for him,but for my brothers. They were just disappointed that i changed so much for a guy who’s not worth. K wanted to get him out for a ‘talk’ but once again i stopped him… Cause whatever that’s going to happen,i should be the one putting it to a full stop,i don’t need anybody’s help…
     

30 Sep (Sun)… … I got a feeling that i’m beginning my insomnia again. After hearing so much of that BITCH,how i wish i got the power to make her disappear from this world to prevent her from causing more hurts to others. I pity her parents for giving birth to such a daughter who don’t know how to cherish herself. HAIX… Since the day he left me,insomnia came to me,on and off… Very ‘nan shou’ lor,want sleep cannot sleep. Got the urge to take my sleeping pills but i know that just taking 1 won’t worked on me,and i’ll unknowingly take alot so i restrain from it… Hehe,good gal hor…
01 Oct (Mon)… … Felt so tired when i woke up,eyes couldn’t even open,but still gotta go work. Feeling so blue,no mood for anything… Lucky got C as companion,was messaging with him. What he said was quite true,i knew that ST(T) still couldn’t forget his ex,therefore he choose to do it this way… A boring day,meet that stupid ‘gui-dan’ went Hg Point la kopi. Again,couldn’t sleep when reached home,wrote letters to Boon,Kelvin and SmallBoy,they will be releasing next year… Sms YC telling him i wanted to take back my things from him tomorrow as i’ll be free,he said he’ll pass to me on Thursday instead. As i still can’t confirm whether i’ll be free on that day anot he replied in a sarcastic way saying i’m now a busy gal,FUCK lor,he can meet BITCH i cannot meet other guys meh…??? I already tried very hard not to let him affect my mood but… … The more i LOVE him,the more i HATE him…
02 Oct (Tue)… … Actually had wanted to go his house take my things,don’t wana wait for him till Thursday,but couldn’t make it. With XZ went Clementi central meet V… While leaving Clementi for Tuas,was at the junction where i think that was his house if i didn’t remember wrongly. Ha,go Clementi heart also can weigh a thousand ton,just because of a relationship that won’t be started. Soon,i managed to slightly put aside the moody me when we reached Tuas. S13 vs VR4,loaded… After 2 rounds,home sweet home… Must be tire out due to sleepless nights for 2 days,i fell asleep after listening to my current’s favourite song,and i dreamt of him…lolx…